RAW this week starts with a video recap of last week’s Fatal Four Way Match. Kane looked about to win the match but Batista came back with a spear to win the number one contender-ship. After the match Kane lost his mind. He kept screaming, “Is he alive or dead?” He attacked a number of people ringside before turning on the announcers. He had Cole in the ring and was demanding answers. King saved Cole but took a nasty beating for it.
Steph and Shane are on the screen. They look concerned. They say they’re very unhappy with how things have been going on the past couple shows. They both have pleaded for everyone to pull together while they have to be away while their father recovers (never mind Steph being due in about 2 weeks). They talk about seeing vehicular attacks, the crowning of a new champion, a champion removed from the arena and more. They ask everyone to please work together as one or there would be problems. They finish it off by saying they will be watching.
HBK attacks Y2J at the bottom of the ramp. HBK is beating the hell out of Y2J at the bottom of the ramp. I don’t know why it’s starting this way, but… Cade comes out and rescues Y2J. Security hold HBK back while Cade and Y2J run off.
Cole and King are talking about what just happened and Kane’s fire and music erupts. Kane comes stomping out. He goes to the other side of the ring and people, including Lillian scurry away screaming.
Kane leans on the announce table growls “sorry” at Cole and King. The fans chant, “Jerry.” Kane leaves.
Out back HBK and Y2J are fighting again.
Mickie comes bouncing to the ring in blue and purple. Katie and her brother come down to the ring.
Katie quickly gains control, but Mickie rolls her up for a quick two. Forearms to Katie’s face followed by a back elbow from Mickie. Katie uses Mickie’s hair to slam her down for two. A forearm to the back of Mickie’s head. Forearms to Katie’s gut and face. Katie then counters a move and covers for two. Again Katie uses Mickie’s hair for control. Side headlock with use of boobs on Mickie (shocked Mickie could breathe!). Mickie gets slammed into a corner but then kicks Katie away. Katie comes back fighting. Head scissors to Katie. Mickie climbs, flies and gets the three.
– Winner: Mickie
Mickie celebrates in the ring and Katie confronts her. Paul grabs Mickie from behind and holds her while Katie takes her title strap and starts beating on Mickie. They both flee the ring when Kofi runs to the rescue.
Kofi wants a fight right now.
Paul and Kofi are in the ring having an IC Title Match. Kofi is in control in a corner. Kofi rolls Paul up for two. Mickie’s still out there and cheering Kofi on. Arm bar on Paul. Arm drag to Paul for two. Another arm bar to Paul. Kofi gets slammed down but comes back with a drop kick for two. Another arm hold on Paul. Paul uses Kofi’s hair to back him into a corner. Paul counters Kofi in a corner and gains control. A kick to Kofi’s gut and Paul covers for two. “Let’s go Kofi” chants. Paul slams Kofi to the mat on a reversal. Paul covers for two. Paul stomps Kofi then flips/slams Kofi to the mat for two. Kofi gets whipped but gets his feet up. Kicks from Kofi. Kofi hits a clothesline followed by a drop kick. Double leg drop from Kofi. Katie tries to get involved and Mickie pulls her from the apron and takes her down. Kofi hits his finisher for three.
– Winner: Kofi
Kofi and Mickie in the ring celebrating together.
Out back Santino is talking to Matt Striker. He says he gave an open invitation to anyone in the locker room. He says after he beats the hell out of that person no one will remember what Rey did to him last week.
The guy leaves and Kane is there behind Santino. Santino says he didn’t mean Kane in his invitation.
Kane asks, “Where’s Punk?”
Santino responds, “Did you check the Pepsi machine?”
Kane again asks, “Where’s Punk?”
Santino says he thinks he’s down in a locker room and points him in a vague direction. Kane leaves and Santino starts dumping a bottle of Tums down his gullet.
Kane and Punk out back in a locker room. Kane says, “Deep down inside I know he’s dead.” Kane says he knows they’ve been tag partners before, but he needs a one on one match tonight.
Punk says he has his biggest match ever in 6 days and Kane wants to face him tonight?
Kane says he needs to…
Punk says he needs to show the nay-sayers that he’s worthy of the title, that it wasn’t a fluke. He needs to show he could beat Batista, so he’ll face Kane.
Punk then asks Kane what’s in the bag. The camera zones in on a burlap sack tied off with rope that’s in Kane’s hands. Kane just laughs.
Grisham out back with Cena. He talks about the NYC Parking Lot Brawl.
Cena says he’s tried to be as neutral and upbeat as possible with the McMahon’s have been out, but not this week. People who know this match know why he doesn’t have a smile on his face. Two men in one parking lot surrounded by cars and whatever they can find. They will find out if human flesh can hold up to it. They will find out if careers will be cut short. Why would he accept such a challenge? He doesn’t like JBL and he doesn’t like Cena. They go back to WM21. If they’re going to draw guns one more time it makes sense they do it at GAB. JBL considers himself a great American and it makes Cena sick. He hopes to pick up that great American and break his bones. To bash that great American’s head into car windows. Holding a 200lbs door over a great American and watching the fear in his eyes. JBL won’t be facing a spoon fed pretty boy, he’s facing a war beaten man. NYC Parking Lot Brawl is his type of fight. Tonight he has a challenge of his own. Cryme Tyme shows up flanking him. He says he found two guy who hate JBL as much as Cena does. So JBL needs to find two guys. So, if JBL’s got a pair he needs to meet them in the ring for a 6 Man Tag Match.
Santino is in the ring asking who’s going to come out to face him. Beth comes out to the ring!?!? He’s in a shiny black halter jumpsuit. Santino takes off his shirt and gets ready.
They lock up and he’s shocked when he can’t push her back. They lock up again and the same thing happens. He poses his muscles, she gives hers. He slams her down but she ends up on top. She’s about to punch him when they realized her hand was on her boob. He quickly moved it. Scoop slam to Santino. She covers for two. He won’t let her whip him and yells he’s a man, but she gains control and quickly rolls him up for three.
– Winner: Beth
He’s trying to act cool in the ring and she flexes at him again. He falls on his bum and rolls from the ring. He runs up the ramp while she smiles.
Out back Kelly is getting ready for her match.
Kelly comes out to the ring in metallic gold. Cody and DiBiase come out to the ring in jeans and button down shirts. DiBiase takes a mic and says they don’t care she had a match, but they have something to say so she has to leave. Cody tells her to go on.
Cody says they’ve received a lot of unwanted criticism, that they’re bad people. They’re not bad, they’re realistic. And they’re not their fathers. When you’re this talented, you don’t pay dues.
Ted says they’re in their early 20’s. When they reach their 30’s they’ll be in their prime.
“Hooooooooooooooooooo” Out comes Hacksaw. He says he’s out to talk to them form the heart. He’s known them since they were kids. He tagged with Dusty and fought against Ted. They’re like him, old school. They appreciated people who paved the way. They are very talented. As performers they’re a whole other level, but as people they have a lot of growing to do.
Cody says that they do have a lot to learn. But what he really thinks about when he thinks of growing up he thinks of a guy in his 50’s wearing gym shorts trying to relive his prime, that wasn’t great in the first place.
Ted says he thinks of something Austin said. That if you’re not in the WWE to win the title, you shouldn’t be in the WWE. He asks if hacksaw really thinks he could win a title carrying around the same 2X4 he’s always had. He calls Hacksaw pathetic and tells him to grow up.
They leave the ring, but don’t get far as JBL comes on the tron. He says they’re right, they don’t have to pay any dues. They can main event tonight with JBL going after Cena and his thugs. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime. Cody and Ted look at each other, talk a bit and nod a lot.
Slam Of The Week – Fatal Four Way from last week. Batista won by pinning Kane.
Kane’s music and he comes to the ring with the sack still in his hand. Cole and King talk about Kane’s “defiant” apology. Punk comes out to face him.
Punk throws some kicks but tries to stay away from Kane. Kane tosses Punk in a corner. Punk comes back with kicks. Punch to the back of Punk’s head. Hard punches to Punk in a corner. Kane telegraphs and gets kicked. Punk sens Kane flying outside which pisses him off and sends people fleeing out of his way. Punk tries to a baseball slide but Kane moves and hits an upper cut. Back in the ring Punk is whipped then clotheslined in a corner. Kane covers for two. Scoop slam to Punk. Big boot to Punk’s face. Kane covers for two. Side headlock on Punk. “CM PUNK” chants. Punk is again slammed down. Head lock on Punk in the center of the ring. Punk works to his feet and out. Punk monkey climbs Kane, but can’t get anywhere with it. Punk gets free and kicks the heck out of Kane. A knee to Kane’s jaw in a corner. Punk tries for a bulldog but can’t. Dropkick to Kane’s knee. A kick to the back of Punk’s head. He has a hard time rolling Kane over but only gets a one count. Punk flies and hits a HARD cross body for two. Punk is going for the GTS, but Kane grabs him. Punk somehow kicks Kane in the head but still can’t gain control. Punk is tossed from the ring. Outside Kane tries to slam Punk into the ring post, but Punk reverses it. Punk gets on the apron and flies. The ref is counting. Punk gets back in at 9, Kane doesn’t.
– Winner: Punk
The ref flees as the first chair hits the ring. Two more fly in and Kane goes in and takes Punk down. He puts Punk’s head in a chair and starts climbing. Batista’s music stops him. A spear puts Kane down briefly. A hard hit with a chair removed Kane from the ring. Batista scrapes Punk off the mat and makes sure he’s okay. Punk extends his hand. Batista talks to him about the title belt and gives him what’s meant to be a friendly (if a bit hard and ‘you’re a little boy’) face slap. Punk smirks a moment, then pushes Batista in annoyance. Spinebuster to Punk.
Video of Cryme Tyme and Cena destroying JBL’s limo.
Y2J’s music and he comes out with Cade in tow. Video of HBK’s earlier attack on Y2J. London runs to the ring to face him. Cade is sitting ringside to watch for HBK.
Y2J quickly attacks London and beats him into a corner. He seems a bit out of control. London harshly gets tossed through the ropes and out. Y2J goes out and tries to rip apart the barrier and then slams London’s head on it. Back in the ring Y2J chokes London on the middle rope. Y2J then stands on London’s back as he’s over the rope. Cade is pacing outside with chair in hand. London tries to fight back but gets kicked in the gut. A kick to Y2J’s head and then London gets whipped. A clothesline to London in the center of the ring and he’s whipped again. A back breaker. Y2J is asking where HBK is as he’s beating London. A horrible walls gets locked in on London who taps. Y2J finally lets go long after the bell is rung.
– Winner: Y2J
Y2J grabs a mic and tells London to take this loss and use it to his advantage. He has two road his career can follow, the HBK road or the Y2J road. He needs to choose wisely. London pulls himself back away from Y2J the whole time he looms over him and talks.
HBK’s music and he comes to the bottom of the ramp. Cade stands in front of the ring, chair in hand. HBK says he’ll never change Y2J’s mind and Y2J will never change his. He says Y2J thinks he’s taken the path of righteousness and truth, HBK says he doesn’t know the meaning of those words. At GAB, the worst is yet to come. “HBK” chants.
Jamie Nobel is out back trying to hit on Layla. She says she doesn’t date short men. He says he’s not short, 5 foot 6 is average for men. Plus he’s more than average in the ring. Then next guy who walks by he will snatch up and take apart in the ring. Snitsky rushes up and tells Jamie to shut up as he can hear him all the way down the hall. Layla asks if that’s how he’s going to Show her.
Jamie calls Snitsky back, comments on Snitsky’s broken nose and continues to scream in his face while Layla tries to stop him. He tells Snitsky to follow him to the ring. Jamie heads out holding onto Layla’s hand until she’s able to get free. He keeps telling her that he’s the man.
Jamie attacks Snitsky as he enters the ring, but that doesn’t last long. Snitsky takes control and whips Jamie. Jamie gets his feet up, but is then slammed down. There’s no ref or bell. A cup handle slam from Snitsky. Snitsky looks down at Layla and then leaves the ring.
Layla gets on the apron as if she’s going to go to Jamie, but then decides against it and leaves.
Replay of the Shane and Steph video from the start of the Show.
The announcers run through the matches for GAB.
JBL’s music and he comes out with Cody and Ted in tow. They talk at the top of the ramp then head for the ring.
JBL, Cody and Ted are still standing in the ring together. Cryme Tyme come out to the ring but don’t enter the ring. Cena comes out to join them. They enter together and the heels leave.
Cena’s ready to go, Cody stays to face him. A kick to Cody’s gut and he’s then slammed into a corner. “Cena” chants. Suplex to Cody. Cody gets slammed into a corner. Cena acts like he’s going to hit Cody who ducks. Shad tags in and Cody tries to gain control, but runs into a hard clothesline. Cody then does gain control. Ted tags in. Shoulder block to Ted. Ted gets bounced off a corner and suplexed for two. Scoop slam and JTG tags in. JTG flies and covers for two. Cody gets a blind tag and Ted’s distraction leads to a drop kick to JTG. Cody beats on JTG then throws punches. JTG comes back fighting. JTG covers for two. JBL grabs JTG from the apron and slams him down when the ref’s not looking. JBL tags in and beats down JTG in a corner. He taunts Cena with a ‘you can’t see me’. Cena tries to enter but the ref won’t let him. JBL stomps JTG hand and beats on him a bit. Ted tags in. JTG starts fighting back but can’t gain control. They keep him isolated in the heel corner. Cody tags in. Punches to JTG in a corner. Leg hold on JTG while Ted tags in. “Cena” chants.
Ted keeps working on JTG’s left leg.
Shad tagged in during the break. Cody takes Shad down. JBL tags in. Cheap shots to Shad and Cena tries to fight through the ref to get there. JBL drops 4-5 elbows on Shad. Cody tags in and flies. Knee to Shad’s side and Cody gets a leg lock on him. “Let’s go Cena” chants. Shad gets bounced off a corner. Shad then sends Cody flying across the ring when Cody tries to hit a bulldog. Cody hits a cheap shot on Cena so Shad can’t tag out. Ted tags in and covers for two. Shad comes back with punches but it doesn’t last long. Shad gets his head bounced off the corner but then drops Cody. Shad manages to tag out. A couple shoulder block to Cody. Ted rushes in and gets tossed around too. A five knuckle shuffle to Ted. Cena takes Cody down and then climbs. Cena flies and hits a leg drop to the back of Cody’s head. STFU on Cody but JBL kicks Cena from behind. The ref calls for the bell.
– Winners: Cena & Cryme Tyme via DQ (I think)
JBL leaves the ring, heads up the ramp and taunts Cena to follow him. Cena does, of course. Cena runs after JBL who’s running through the out back. JBL runs out a door. Cena kicks the door open after thinking about it. He goes out to nothing… He jumps around corners expecting to find JBL, but nothing. There’s a white SUV out there, but nothing else really. Suddenly JBL attacks from behind with a tire tron. He sets Cena up, barely sitting, leaning against the driver’s side door. JBL then gets in a larger red car and drives into the white car/Cena. They very carefully cut the camera angles so it’s never showing Cena being hit.
JBL gets out of the car and walks over to the front end. He looks down at the carnage that should be Cena, looks like he’s going to barf, covers his face and walks away from it.
Cody & Ted